I put a pot of Crocuses in my counseling office in mid January – I felt the lack of living foliage amid the silk greenery. When I went in to the office this week, the little purple flowers were beginning to unfold. While their color was wonderful, I was keenly aware that I was literally forcing them to bloom before their natural time. I was mentally jumping to March – again – and not remaining present in January.
Does it matter that I don’t know if I did 4 or 5 Sun Salutations when I did my yoga this morning? My mind wandered to the things I want to do, ought to do, and dread doing in the next days. I wonder if the yoga did any good while my mind wandered around the canyons of my thoughts.
It is a difficult task to stay anchored in the present for me – especially in January – when all I want is for it to please get warm, please let the snow melt – please help me find a cheap ticket to Arizona. Failing all those requests, all I want when the alarm goes off in the morning, is to get through the day so I can get back into my warm bed and go back to sleep. If I could be an animal in winter, it would be a bear.
January asks me to stretch – not just in yoga, but in imagination, in acceptance, in patience. Yet this is not enough: what is needed to buttress these three, is appreciation. Appreciation makes ‘January patience’ possible.